The Good-Looking Suit

Sam decides he’s going to splurge on a new suit. There’s only one men’s clothing store in town, but Sam agrees with the salesman that they have one of the best-looking suits he’s ever seen.

Sam wears the suit into the office on Monday, where his boss immediately says, “Sam, that is a terrific-looking suit. But am I mistaken, or is one pant leg just a little longer than the other?”

Sam returns to the store. “You’re right,” the salesman says, “the legs are a little uneven. Here’s the thing. My tailor just quit on me a couple of days ago, and I haven’t found anybody to replace him yet. In the meantime, if you just hook your thumb in the belt loop on the left side and pull it up a little as you walk, nobody will notice the difference.”

At lunch, Sam sees an old friend, who says, “Wow, that is a good-looking suit. Is it new? But, you know what, I think one sleeve is a little longer than the other.”

Back at the clothing store, the salesman says, “Now that I look at it, I’m afraid you’ve got a point. But see here, if you just hold your right arm out at an angle like this and tug the sleeve up like this, you don’t notice it at all.”

Sam stops by the drug store on his way back to the office, where the pharmacist says, “Sam, that is a fantastic-looking suit. But—and I almost hate to bring this up—is that left lapel a little wider than the other?”

Back at the clothing store, the salesman looks Sam over carefully and says, “I’ve got to admit it’s true. But look, if you just refold the lapel like this and tuck it under your chin, nobody will notice. And I’m sure to get a new tailor any minute now.”

Two doctors are standing on the sidewalk outside the pharmacy as Sam exits. They turn to watch him shuffle down the street, neck twisted, arms akimbo, half-turned sidewise.

The first doctor shakes his head and says, “That’s one of the worst cases I’ve ever seen.”

“Yeah,” the second doctor says wistfully. “But it sure is a good-looking suit.”